Neil Tambe

Husband, Father, Citizen, Professional.

I'm a Detroiter who happens to enjoy writing, national parks, orange juice, the performing arts, and fanciful socks. More than anything though, I aspire to be a good husband, father, and citizen.

Giving

My parents sacrificed a lot in their lives. That's a story for another evening, but the act of sacrifice is a very important act outside of marriage, too. I'll discuss it here in the context of relationships in general. It is Valentines Day, after all.

A very simple interpretation of relationships is that they are a give and take, a push and pull where the currency is not newtonian forces, nor cash...but energy, time and emotion. In relationships we give and receive.

Sometimes, however, relationships aren't in balance. Sometimes one party in the arrangement gives much more than their "fair-share" and the other free-rides. Some treat relationships with a tit-for-tat strategy...I'll do to you as you do to me.

But sometimes, others can't give for awhile, or even for an exceptionally long time. Maybe they can't admit they're wrong. Maybe they can't express how they feel. Maybe they just don't have the time or the money.

At the same time, once you commit to someone, you give and give and give and give, for as long as you can....you give even as your world is tumbling and you're bitter. If you have nothing else to give, you keep giving.

And, on this Valentines Day I'm not going to complain about not "receiving" Valentinesy affections or sentiments from anyone. I'll advocate that people keep giving their hearts away and try to live by my own words.

Because that's just what one should do.